If there is anything we should all learn from this ongoing Wizkid baby mama Saga; it is the fact that the existing baby mama narrative is changing, and ladies especially, must listen. Please note that this is quite long.
Just a few weeks ago, a video surfaced on social media showing Nigerian ariste, Timaya dishing out ‘advice’ to his fellow male artistes that “marriage is not important, just have a baby, and you will be fine”.
That message, if considered critically, negates what a number of ladies try to do, in order to get into the lives of some men who are perceived to be rich, wealthy, influential or celebrities.
“Just get him in bed and let him get you pregnant. He will be forced to have the baby, and take care of you in the process.”Timaya, Nigerian Music Artiste
This approach has pretty much worked out for a lot of ladies; putting some men in dire circumstances, with some of them losing a huge chunk of their wealth or their entire career to that moment of indiscretion.
Nothing goes on forever, they say; and we might just start to see how men are beginning to get wiser. Timaya has said his truth; Davido had his own share of babymama saga last year, just as many other celebrities who are breeding kids out of wedlock. One thing however stands out; these guys are more concerned about the kids than the women who birthed them.
That should tell women that having a child for a man does not guarantee your place in his life. Wizkid is the poster boy for this harsh truth!
Granted, Shola got pregnant for him when he was still growing, but Ayo was not ready for that baby. It would appear then that he’d been forced to have the child, and he can’t stop resenting her for (I presume) “not doing what her mates would have done”.
This does not excuse the sheer action and reaction of Wizkid towards Shola, it only serves the harsh truth that women do not always hold the exclusive decision to birth a child; you still need the input of the man you expect (if you actually do) to be the father and shoulder the responsibility too.
Having a baby doesn’t start from when you get pregnant; it actually starts from when you decide to have sex – unprotected sex!
Wizkid was not the only one who was unprotected in that sex. Shola was not drugged, she was not raped either. Heck, she enjoyed it as much as he did. What were they both expecting to happen afterwards; the birth of more money?
As God would have it, something popped that would change their lives for good – A baby! Ayo had to become an early father, Shola had to shoulder a responsibility too big for her age and experience. And in the case where Ayo doesn’t want the child but still has to play his fatherly role, he is transferring aggression, and doesn’t seem like he will ever care about Shola, even if she will always love him.
Sad reality is that Shola will always bear the brunt, except she decides to take charge of her life henceforth.
Sooner or later, Wizkid may be forced to play a real part in the life of his child, but he may never adequately compensate Shola. This social media pity party may be the best she will ever get in terms of respite.
Ladies need to learn from this Wizkid baby mama saga. Pregnancy may put you in a man’s life, it won’t keep you there, and it won’t guarantee you money; happiness neither.
Wizkid is no longer the kid of that year. He should know better now, and realize that despite all the positive PR he’s been getting lately with his global music and runway appearances, this one is a big dent that he must fix sooner than later. It doesn’t cost him anything to follow @FolarinXO’s advice and put things in shape.
Guys need to learn too. I understand many of you are willing to follow Timaya’s ill-timed advice. Some other guys even try to use pregnancy to force a girl to marry them. Stop and think!
Pregnancy can only make you a father, it doesn’t make you a husband. Just as men can decide to be invisible to their babymamas, women can also deny you access into the life of that child you are trying to forcefully have through them. Nothing is guaranteed.
If you will have a child, talk it over with the one you are about to sleep with. If you can’t talk, use protection. Don’t go raw and expect an edit to reality.
Laslas, all of us go dey alright.
Thanks for reading my arrant nonsense. Do you also have thoughts about the Wizkid baby mama saga? Please share in the comments section.