This is quite long, but its worth it. This piece intends to open your eyes to certain realities that will matter to your relationship. Be warned; this has a potential capacity to make you quit your relationship after reading.
If it ever comes down to you making the decision to quit your relationship after reading this, you would have gained freedom and valuable knowledge which will prove useful in your next relationship. Enjoy the piece below from our friends at The GMP.
I have a simple theory about the world. The reason why more people aren’t ending up in wildly enthusiastic relationships is simply due to one thing: they’re not getting out of bad relationships soon enough. They stay in something “ok” for months and even years on end, preferring the safety of mediocrity to the angst of loneliness. In the end, they fail to make space in their lives for the right person because there’s no room.
And I know some people take issue with this, saying they were dating three years (or more) before they truly fell in love, and now they’ve been together 40 years now, blah, blah, blah. And I don’t deny that can happen, too. But what happens a lot more often is people who are in limbo for years simply get married because they feel they can’t “waste” the five years they’ve been together by splitting up now, and instead go on to waste 10 more miserable years together being in an incompatible relationship they don’t have the courage to get out of.
Now, this theory of high standards has to apply to yourself as well—don’t settle for a mediocre version of yourself if you want to attract an amazing mate. Be someone who chases your dreams, if you want that characteristic in your mate. Be someone who brings as much to the table as you expect from them. If you want someone who lives passionately, has an interesting, fulfilling career, has tons of hobbies, fills the room with their personality and inspires other through their actions, then you need to be that kind of person, too.
But you don’t have to wait until someone cheats on you to break up with them. You can simply leave if your heart isn’t fully engaged. (At least while you’re just dating—being married and raising kids together, yes, you need to stick around and give it every shot you can unless you’ve suffered too much to stomach any more.) You can exit if you simply feel, “Hey, I like you. We’re having a ‘nice’ time. The sex is even pretty decent. But I want more. I deserve to feel more. And so do you.”
This post originally appeared on The Good Men Project.