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IF EVERY FEMALE DISAPPEARED FROM THE PLANET
Everywhere would turn chaotic.
Crashes and accidents from crafts and vehicles manned by women. Cries of children calling for their mothers would fill the world streets. Fathers would start to panic. Boyfriends would be found running round their rooms, terrified of how she had suddenly disappeared from beneath/above/ the side.
Smell of burning food would fill the atmosphere.
Some husbands would be hit by relief.
1ST 24 HOURS
The world would be on fire; literal fire; especially in nations where the kitchens belonged to the women, and the women to the kitchens. This would cause the second set of deaths. Countries without proper fire and emergency services would become hell.
Hopes high, stupid search parties would begin.
Conspiracy theorists would swing into action. Forgotten prophecies would be exhumed and forced to align; new ones would be made too. Science would be confused and clueless. Religions would march out with gods and answers. Fake preachers would take to the streets,
“this is the first phase of the rapture! Repent!”
Male ‘deputies’ of female leaders in countries like Germany, Argentina and Liberia would get sworn in, other important positions would be filled too.
AFTER ONE WEEK
The third set of deaths. Human babies cannot survive without the support of another human, so an insignificant percentage of fatherless newborns will die, lack of motherly nurture and love would kill them.
Confusion would reach its peak. Romeos would flood bars, seeking their Juliets in bottles. Formerly relieved husbands would start to feel sober. Shock and fear would soon join the murderers.
The world would turn dark.
AFTER ONE MONTH
Major depressive disorder would claim more lives. Confusion would begin to plateau out and decline. A mad sense of hopelessness would kick in. Many men, especially Nigerian men would start to die of hunger.
The world would take a giant but shaky step towards moving on.
AFTER THREE MONTHS
Sales and costs of male sex toys would skyrocket. A lot of men would begin considering other men. Is it not the same hole? Celibates and Fathers would be seen celebrating their years of training. It would dawn on virgins and they would shed hot tears.
Small businesses would crumble. Clubs would close down, night parties would cease to exist.
AFTER SIX MONTHS
A great period of ‘sexual distress’ would descend upon the planet.
Same sex marriage would be on its way to global acceptance.
Men would lose the motivation to do a lot of things. Global crime rate will drop drastically. Brothers would become more friendly and fight less.
Childbirth would become a myth. Gradually, the world population would begin to decline- human and animal.
Huge companies would be forced to perish- makeup companies, clothing lines, pornography industries, etc.
The entertainment industry, especially the Nigerian music industry would experience a terrible and horrific death. ‘Musicians’ would have nothing to sing about again.
Forget artificial sperms and eggs, cloning would be impossible. Scientists would begin making moves towards recreating the female from the male’s DNA, it wouldn’t succeed for long.
Female robots would be the order of the day.
Surgeons would have done more anal and facial operations. Males with feminine features would be seen on the streets.
Extinction of the human race.
TWO HUNDRED YEARS
The earth would begin to heal.