The issue of money in relationship is quite an unending one. There have been different school of thoughts about the indispensability of money in a relationship. Before you share your thought about it, I’d like you to read this break up story from a friend, Kelvin. “I thought she loved my money. It looked like it was the only thing she loved about me, so I ended the relationship. Turned out I was wrong and now I know better. I wish I could turn back the hands of time” he said to me when we met. You should read his story and learn from it.
Here’s our Break up story of the week, in the exact words of Kelvin.
I found a lady I liked and would love to marry, so we started a relationship. Everything was good, I was doing well in my career and got a promotion and I was excited to start a family, so I decided to start preparing for it.
I had some self-esteem issues. I had it ingrained in my mind that you need financial worth to be loved. I used previous relationships as proof that I needed to be wealthy in order to be loved. I constantly anticipated that my relationship wouldn’t work out and I would be abandoned for lack of wealth or cheated on. I walked around assuming people thought it was the “first” relationship I had.
My relationship with this lady got to a point where I assumed I was being used for money. She wanted me to buy things and give her money for almost everything. It might have been her dream to have those things, but I didn’t see it that way. It was like I subconsciously waited for an excuse to end the relationship. Instead of trying to work through it, I abandoned the relationship and eventually gave up on it. I was loved by her and her family but I hurt everyone with the break up. It was the most rude, insecure, selfish thing I did. I just gave up on a future, family, and love because of my insecurities and lack of maturity.
It was a Saturday and I called her and told her she didn’t love me, she loved my money and I asked her forget everything. It was the last time I ever spoke to her. Now that I look back on it, I am ashamed.
I assumed she didn’t love me and told her this, but she refused and said she did. I didn’t listen, rather I told her to meet someone else that was financially wealthy enough and I told her she would not see my ugly face again.
It’s true you need to love yourself before you love another person, as cliché as it sounds. If you don’t value yourself, how do you expect someone else will. And the other “don’t care what others think” is true. You can’t go through life basing a relationship on what an outside force will think or assume.
If I could go back I would have handled myself differently and waited until I had my self-esteem and confidence intact. She is in a better relationship now, and I wish her the best, even though I miss her and wish I could go back in time to make better choices.
– Kelvin M.
So, what do you think about Kelvin’s story? We’d love to hear from you.
Read Also: The role of MONEY in your relationship