I feel like it’s a good time to bring up the issue of men and their mommies. What exactly am I referring to? The fact that your man’s relationship with his mother can affect your relationship — in either a good way or a bad way.
So, now the guy starts to date. Ever heard the saying, “How he treats his mom is an indicator of how he will treat his wife?” Again, there are exceptions, but for the most part I believe this statement to be true.
I called my friend the next day and told her about the conversation. Her advice: “Run,” which I did.
All that said, the love and the gestures have to be genuine. In other words, if the man is sweet to his mother out of fear, it is a turn-off. Maybe the mom is demanding or controlling. Maybe she makes him feel guilty. A man who is afraid of his mom and acts out of a sense of obligation will ultimately resent his mom, which is never good for him, or for your relationship with him.
Then there’s the mama’s boy. There’s a fine line between a man who is a good son and a guy who is excessively attached to his mommy. I have three pieces of advice for women when it comes to your guy and his mom:
1. Let him spend time with her alone. If your spouse has a great relationship with his mom, be happy for them and let them spend time together without you or the kids. He will appreciate you for that.
2. You don’t have to have the same relationship with her that he does. Maybe your mother-in-law and her son don’t particularly get along, but the two of you naturally click. Or, maybe they are close, and you and your mother-in-law have never seen eye-to-eye. You are entitled to have your own relationship with her, independent of your spouse’s. If it causes an issue, you need to sit him down and talk about it.
3. Keep your mouth shut. If you mother-in-law says something that causes you to want to throw the apple pie sitting on the table in her face, I would suggest refraining not only from starting a food fight, but from bringing it up to your husband. What is he going to do about it? Nothing but become irritated and angry, most likely with you. And, if your husband says something negative about his own mom, say nothing. Remember, he’s allowed to complain about her, you’re not!
Have I suggested something you don’t quite agree with, let me have your opinion in the comment box below. Thanks.
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