This week, our social media pulse takes us to the wall of Vivien Adaeze, and she is talking about the essence of dating. Essentially, things we should consider before, during or after a (failed) relationship. This will prove handy, trust me.
Over to Vivien, as she tells us about the essence of dating.
Be with someone who can add value to your life!!
I think any serious relationship need to add value to your life other than having someone tell you ‘I love you‘ , ‘you mean the world to me‘ and the rest of those words that makes us go mushy.
What’s the point of being with anyone if you cannot learn anything from them.. If they cannot teach you anything. Why should you be dating someone who cannot come into your life and complement it? Someone who cannot come and challenge how I think or act or teach me a thing or two?
One of the questions I think any reasonable person should ask after some time spent in a relationship is
– What has my time with this person taught me?
– Can he/she contribute to my life and my goals?
The answers to these question should pilot you on where the relationship should head to.
Our relationships with people should either add or subtract from us. If it is neither doing one them, then it’s time to reevaluate.
You should have someone who comes into your life and take you several steps forward. Someone who is concerned about adding value to their life because no one can give you what they do not have or understand. A person who is progressively forward and still makes time to tell you ‘hey you, handle your business ……‘
Some of us stay in relationship for years. Stagnant relationships that takes us several steps back. Abusive relationships that ADDS only scars and pains. Sad relationships that have robbed us of the very essence of who we are. Evil relationships that got our dreams killed due to esteem issues and a desire to appear acceptable. Deadly relationships that have robbed of peace of mind. Ugly relationships that are manipulative and destructive. Baseless relationships that serves no purpose other than material and bodily gratifications.
Yet we stay!
Relationships should be symbiotic. Both parties willing to improve the life of the other in any form necessary.