Almost every relationship starts out with butterflies flying everywhere. You are in love and everything is beautiful and blissful. You’re ready to give all you have and do all you can for your partner, and you expect the same in return. The relationship seem unbreakable and you fully settle. But as time travels and the relationship ages, you start changing and developing behaviours that diminishes the mushiness into ordinariness; ultimately putting the relationship in problems. In some cases, the love is totally lost and may take forever to bring back!
Years into a relationship, there is a high chance to (unconsciously) adopt some behaviours that can slowly cause problems in your relationship, and you don’t even know you do them. In order to consciously keep yourself in check, here are some common behaviours that may put your relationship in problems, which you should avoid:
How would you feel if suddenly the one who was once supportive and loving starts complaining and criticizing you for things you do? When you want to share something or seek advice he/she is too busy or blames you for your problems. There is no respect for you or your needs. This behaviour destroys relationships.
Involving third parties in your issues
It’s common for in-laws and friends to create problems between couples that lead to big arguments. They can become so huge that it’s hard to face each other. Try to keep your issues between you two and solve them on your own. You can plan holidays so that you rotate between his family and yours.
Dominating behaviour is harmful, from anyone. Initially you may love that confident behaviour of your girl or guy, the way they tackle every problem that comes their way. You may even be proud of them. But after a month or so you realize you don’t agree with them on everything. There are things you like that they don’t, but you enjoy the restaurants and activities he chooses. They want you to stay the same adoring creature with no opinions of your own.
Mistrust or hiding things
If you feel you have to conceal things from your spouse it can damage your relationship. How would you feel if your partner behaves oddly and avoids answering questions? Open honest communication is essential.
Holding a grudge
If you have a habit of holding on to grudges it can erode your love. If you can’t let go of your partner’s mistakes, you can’t survive in a relationship. Learn to forgive and move on as a couple.
Same old song
Initially you talk your heart out and say everything and anything. You praise their every move and express how lovable they are. As time passes, things change, but not your words. You say the same things you said the first night just for the heck of it. The repeated words can bore your partner and they no longer sound sincere. They start to enjoy hearing new words from new voices. Don’t be predictable.
There are other behaviours apart from these ones I have highlighted, but if you can begin to take care of them and consciously keep yourself in check, the chances of putting your relationship in problems would be massively reduced.